Ready to be myself

Hey all, i know ive failed at posting the past few weeks. Ive just had a lot of stuff going on. Im ready to get back on track and finish what i have started. I weighed myself a few days ago, and i have gained a pound. But im not going to count it! This friday, i will do an official weigh in. Hopefully its better than the last one! Thanks for being patient and for all the support!

Session 1 of 12

Sooo.... Boot camp wasn't so bad.  Our trainer, Adam, is awesome.  He was pushing us during the exercises, but he also helped us with our technique and stuff.  We were probably the youngest two in the class, but there were some older ladies with awesome abs! I was definitely motivated! I feel great now that I have showered, eaten, and relaxed a little. I'm excited for the rest of our sessions!

I'm Back!

Hey all! I know I haven't posted in over a week.  We had Dan's mom and both my parents in town. My little brother came in town the day after all them.  It was a hectic week, so I was unable to work out.  EEEEK! But I tried to eat well, but didn't eat as well as I should or have been. I was too scared to weigh in all weekend for fear of seeing all of my hard work go down the toilet!

But today is the start of a new week and a new adventure.  Today, me and my friend Liz are starting a 4 week, 12 session boot camp!  We go 3 days a week for a month and it only cost us $25 each on Groupon! I'm slightly freaking out as I think about my experience in a REAL military boot camp.  Now don't get me wrong, Navy boot camp 4 years ago was not all that hard, per say.  But I was in excellent shape leftover from my softball years.  This time, I weigh almost 100 lbs more, have given birth that resulted in a broken tailbone, and haven't done anything super athletic in a very long time (excluding P90X).  I'm terrified that I'm going to look and feel like a walrus doing these exercises.  Have you ever seen a walrus move around?! It's awful to watch.  I guess I'll let y'all know how it goes, so expect another post this afternoon.  Wish me luck!

Push ups aren't easy for walruses... walri?

Weigh In Fri...Err.... Saturday?

For those of you who don't know, my amazing husband came home from a month long underway yesterday!  I spent the morning doing last minute things to the house, doing my hair and makeup, hanging the welcome home banner, dressing the baby. It was a busy morning! I didn't have time before taking a shower to weigh in and what not, so I waited until this morning to do it.

Lucas seeing daddy for the first time in a month!

I am pleasantly surprised with this weeks results.  I can't believe I'm ACTUALLY losing weight!  My friend Erica is on a journey of her own.  She definitely has a fraction of the weight to lose that I do, but she's making awesome progress too! I think she's down over 13lbs since she started a few weeks ago.  She has even inspired her boyfriend to drop soda and work out a little bit.  He's down 10 lbs! It's so motivating to see other people working towards their goal.  I'm so proud of both of them!

Alright, time for the good stuff. I took measurements this week too. Those will be at the bottom of this post.
Last week's weight:

This week's weight:

3.8 lbs down this week! It must be from the P90X I restarted on Monday! I am half a pound away from reaching 20 lbs lost. I'm about 1/5 of the way done with my journey!

Now for the measurements:
Neck: 14.5 (-.5")
Waist: 38" (-1")
Hips: 47.5" (-1.5")
Bust: 42" (-1.5")

Those are the major changes.  I lost a total of about 2 inches from each arm and each leg, too.  Thank you for the support! No I must go feed myself and my awesome kid!

Ch-ch-ch-ch-changes!

Last night, I restarted P90X.  I fell off the work out wagon for about 2 weeks, but I'm back on it! My mind is in the right place again, I feel great! I took a picture of my face last night, and compared it to another from a few weeks ago.  I can see a difference, can you?

Jan 12, 2012

Feb 6, 2012

I know the angles aren't the same, but you get the idea.  I'm very happy with how my body is changing.  I do need to focus a lot more on weight training, I think, to tone up all the loose skin that is associated with weight loss.   My size 20 (eek) jeans are super loose right now, which is awesome.  I have one pair that I can pull on and off without undoing the button or zipper! I really should have done this a while ago!

If you can read this, thank a service member for the freedom to do so!

My "Virginia Beach Best Friend", Liz, posted today on her blog about her feelings of being "left behind" as a military wife.  It got me thinking about how I feel about my own struggles as a Navy wife.  This upcoming deployment won't be my first try, but I am  by no means a professional at being a "single" mom.

Our last night with Daddy.

Last year, I had a job and Lucas was barely mobile.  The six months went by pretty quick.  The worst part for me was feeling guilty about getting to see Lucas do so many exciting new things, while Dan was missing out.  Sure, I sent him tons of pics and wrote to him everyday about what was going on.  But a picture or email could never convey the awesomeness of seeing your child figure out how to roll over, crawl, and even use a straw.  Those are things that most people take for granted as parents, but those are things that Dan will never know of his first born.  Can you imagine missing out on 6 months of your child's first year?  Or even worse, missing the birth of your child as some military men do?  Not from being a dead-beat dad, but from serving your country and providing for your family? I couldn't do it.

Last deployment's cruise book picture of Dan

This deployment, Dan will leave a happy, energetic 17 month old and return to a cranky,energetic two year old.  Lucas says a few words already, but will become much more vocal in the coming months.  Dan won't be here to help me discipline and figure out what works for us.  He will have to learn how to handle a child who is making decisions on how he acts, not just a baby that doesn't know any better. I will have to be good cop and bad cop while hoping I make the best choices for both myself and Dan.  I need to make sure to not take anything for granted, so I can share all the little things with the daddy on the other side of the world.

Homecoming 2011, father and son reunited!

Last deployment, I let myself gain 50 pounds of fat.  I felt sorry for myself, and was overwhelmed with being alone. I have come to realize that I am not alone.  I have a loving family who cares even from 1000 miles away.  I have friends who understand being left behind.  I have an amazing son who keeps me on my toes.  I also have a husband who is strong enough to comfort me, even though deployment is harder on him. 

So, this deployment is for him.  I want to be the strong one for him so he can focus on his job and not worry about us.  I WILL lose weight, not because he thinks I'm fat, but because he deserves a healthy wife.  He deserves a wife that can keep up with housework and Lucas.  I know he will never, ever say otherwise, but he deserves a wife that looks as good as he makes me feel.  I want him to be proud of me, just as I am of him.  I am doing this for me and him, just as I do whenever he is gone. 

Love my family, not my ass!

Friday Weigh-in!

 It's that time again, every one's favorite time of the week! I've been awful, and haven't worked out all week. :( Sunday, Tuesday, and Wednesday were spent painting our upstairs bedroom with a friend. Painting an awkwardly shaped room while wrangling a curious 16 month old is actually pretty difficult.

There were two instances of paint eating (and subsequent mouth wiping with a paper towel).

 This room used to be half done with robins egg blue on the ceiling and a spring green on the walls.  The doors, jambs and window were painted this awful dark brown color.

Even the window pane had paint on it!  Our last roommate left us with a mess. But we won't go there. We had to put two coats of primer on the ceiling and and one on the walls with two coats of paint.

It was definitely a hard project. It looks awesome after all the work! It's pretty bad that the nicest room in the house is a guest room that we never go into. oh well, what do you do? On Monday, I spent nap time repainting the garage door and shutters in the front of the house.  It needs another coat, but I haven't had enough time to do it.  Just don't look at it up close. Kthanks.

Now, on to what you really came here for. Lucas and I have been sick the past few days.  I have never seen that much snot come from his little nose.  He spent last night coughing every few hours. It breaks my heart to see him so miserable.  Especially when I feel so miserable! My weight definitely reflects my lack of effort this week.  So, here it is:

Last weeks weight was 237.2

This weeks weight is...

 235.8! Progress is progress!! That's a 1.4 pound difference! It's not as much as it could be, but we all have off weeks, right?  Next week I'm going to check in with my body measurements too. Next week, Lucas will be getting a daddy shaped surprise too!  Thanks for checking in with me!

Need a jumpstart

So out of it lately. I have no energy to do anything other than what i need to do. Lucas has a cold, so maybe im catching one too? I dont know. But this weeks weigh in is going to be scary. I have been watching how much i eat and stuff, so maybe I will be surprised. Probably not though. Ugh... I just want to go to sleep and wake up in 9 days. Any tips on getting my energy and motivation back? All would be appreciated!

Chocolate Craving Satisfied!

One downfall of being a woman is.. well... you know.  Chocolate cravings come right along 'ol Aunt Flo.  But everything that I want is going to throw my 14.3 lbs lost right back onto my hips. I found on Pinterest today a recipe for black bean brownies.  Sounds pretty nasty, doesn't it? There's a whole can of black beans and no flour in it. Whaaaaat?! Yeah, weird.  But oh so delicious. Me and Lucas shared 3 of them.  I guess I gotta run extra hard tonight.

Each square is one serving...

 1 Can of black beans rinsed off
3 Eggs
3 Tbsp vegetable oil (I used canola oil)
1/4 Cup cocoa powder
Pinch of salt
1 tsp vanilla
3/4 Cup sugar (I used Splenda)

Put everything in the blender and blend until smooth.  Pour into a greased 8x8 pan and bake at 350 degrees for about 30 minutes.  I put chopped walnuts and heath bars on top of mine. Only a little bit of the candy.  These taste just like regular brownies, but without all of the guilt!  The full recipe is on All Recipes here.

Weigh-In Friday!

Good morning my lovely readers! Last night, me and Lucas had homemade fried rice for dinner.  It wasn't fried at all, so I don't really know why it is called that.  Anyways, I sauteed minced onion and ground ginger until soft.  In the same pan, cook cubes of chicken.  I also threw in fresh broccoli with the chicken and onions.  Earlier I had cooked minute rice per directions on the box and mixed in frozen peas.  Once the chicken is fully cooked and the broccoli is soft, dump the rice/pea mix into the pan.  I poured in low sodium soy sauce on everything.  I didn't measure it, but it was less than a tablespoon.  After letting it all combine and warm up, It's done!

Crappy cell phone picture

  It was so yummy, even Lucas loved it!

  Alright, down to the reason for this post.  Last week's weight was 239.0.

This week's weight is......

237.2!! 1.8lbs down since last weigh-in! I'm glad that even though I have been slacking in the working out department, my weight is headed in the correct direction!  It just proves that healthy eating alone can make weight loss possible.  Thanks for the support!

Gotta love Jill! I'm getting back on track.  I have jogged the past 2 nights and did ab workouts afterwards.  I WILL do this!

Off Track

I'm off track with working out. I have no reason or excuse, except that I'm lazy.  I don't want to be lazy! I want to workout! I fell off the P90X wagon.  I need to start again, but I haven't.  I have walked and jogged on my treadmill, but it doesn't feel like enough. I haven't been eating too terribly bad.  No fast food or soda still.  Lots of water.  Maybe it's the weather? Or oncoming monthly doom? Whatever it is, I need to fix it.  Maybe I'll do P90X tonight.  Probably not though.  What's wrong with me people?!

I'm Ready!

Weigh-in Friday!

So, I decided to weigh in on Fridays now.  Mostly because I thought today was Saturday again.  I guess that's what happens when everyday is exactly the same. I think I need to run more often, because my numbers didn't change a whole lot.  I'm not disappointed or discouraged, though.  Progress is progress, no matter how small.  As long as the numbers are going in the correct direction, I'm happy! So, without further adieu, week 7 (I think) weigh-in and measurements!

Last week's weight: 240.2

This week's weight... drum roll please.....

239.0!! 1.2lbs down from last week! it's no 3.4, but I'll take it! So, on to the measurements...

Last neck: 15.0 inches                                               Current neck: 15.0 inches
Last bust:  43.5 inches                                               Current bust:  43.5 inches
Last waist: 40.0 inches                                               Current waist: 39.0 inches
Last hips:   50.5 inches                                              Current hips: 49.0 inches
Last L arm: 14.0 inches                                              Current L arm: 13.25 inches
Last R arm: 14.0 inches                                             Current R arm: 13.25 inches
Last L thigh: 25.75 inches                                          Current L thigh: 24.25 inches
Last R thigh: 25.75 inches                                          Current R thigh: 24.25 inches

Like I said, not much different in the measurements department.  I just gotta work harder next week! I still feel great!  OH! and that picture I couldn't post last night.  Proof that my kid is the cutest ever!

Love him more and more every day!

Dear headache,

You stink. Please go away so i can workout without feeling like my head is going to explode. Any suggestions on how to get rid of it? This is like the 4th day in a row! Wtf!

On a better note, i have the cutest son in the whole wide world! But apparently i cant post pictures from my phone. :( have a great night!

What's for dinner, Dessert Edition

I just had a boring salad for dinner, so I thought I'd just talk about dessert!  It was also pretty boring, but oh so good.  An apple and peanut butter! Good source of protein and fiber, and low in sugar and fat. It satisfied my sweet tooth just fine.  I also discovered Jello sugar free pudding.  Only 60 calories and 0 sugar! If anyone has any low-cal dessert recipes, feel free to share! Have a great night!

Three Years Today

I always thought I would spend my anniversaries with the man I married.  Waking up next to him, getting each other silly cards, flowers, dinner.

January 17, 2009

I never thought I'd spend it without him, without even hearing his voice.  Especially not two in a row.  But that's one of the sacrifices of being in the military, or being a military spouse.  We spend a few holidays apart, just for the freedom to spend many more together.  Doesn't mean I don't miss him like crazy!  I am very lucky to have awesome friends who understand.  My husband may have not been able to give me flowers, but my "Virginia best friend" did.  She surprised me with beautiful red roses and Chick-fil-a.

GASP! Fast food!? yeah, I know.  But everything is OK in moderation.  I'll just workout extra hard today.  I completed day 18 of P90x today and I feel great!  Tonight I'll spend some time bonding with my treadmill.  He's been a little neglected lately due to me feeling badly about Dan being gone.  Only 3 weeks left and he'll be home!  Only for him to leave a month later for 7 months! Ugh that's another post altogether.  Thanks everyone!

What's For Dinner, Morning After Edition.

Sorry I didn't post yesterday, we were busy grocery shopping and cleaning.  So NOT fun, but it can get your blood pumping if you do it right.  Try parking in the back of the lot, forcing you to walk further.  Take the "scenic route" through the store. While shopping, suck in your stomach.  It causes your ab muscles to heat up, burn calories, and tighten them! Same goes for when you're cleaning.  Instead of bending over to pick up after hurricane Lucas the kids, do squats!  Hold those ab muscles in tight while you twist while mopping.  Easy way to burn those calories AND get stuff done at the same time! 

So, after we shopped and cleaned, we had two other navy wife friends whose husbands work on the same ship as mine.  This is where what we had for dinner comes in!  I made a lighter meatloaf using ground turkey instead of ground beef, oatmeal instead of breadcrumbs, applesauce instead of an egg, and fresh herbs instead of seasoning salt.  I cook like my mom does, so I added chopped onions and red bell pepper.  I also mixed in fresh garlic and fresh rosemary.  As sides, i roasted fresh broccoli tossed in olive oil, garlic powder, and pepper. This was the only dish that had any sort of oil in it.  We also had mashed red potatoes with garlic and rosemary.  Instead of butter, I used a little Greek yogurt and 2% milk.  I think the key to this meal is that I used fresh ingredients.  That's the best way to cut calories and fat! If you want the detailed recipe, just ask.  Also, I forgot to take pictures again. My bad! 

After dinner, the four of us went the The Skinny Dip for frozen yogurt! It was delicious and nonfat!

If today is warmer than yesterday, me and Lucas might take a trip to Mt Trashmore (yes that's it's real name!) to walk/jog around the lake track.  There's an awesome playground on the other side of the "mountain" that Lucas likes to stop at.  Here's to another awesome day!

What's For Dinner?

I think I might start posting every night, or at least most nights , about what healthy meals I had.  I'm thinking recipes and if I can figure it out, the nutritional value of it.  Tonight was an easy, quickly put together dinner.  I'm not sure of the nutritional content, but by avoiding tons of butter and using fresh ingredients, any dish can be made healthier! 

Tonight we had chicken tenderloins dipped in just egg whites, rolled in panko breadcrumbs and baked.  Next up was fresh green beans, or "bean beans" as they're called in this house, roasted with a little garlic. Lucas' favorite was the fresh sweet potato fries baked with just a touch of sea salt. So good! Best part was sharing dessert (apples dipped in honey) with my favorite little helper. Next time I'll take pictures! I hope everyone else had a delicious meal, especially one shared with someone you love!

Best.Workout.EVER.

Chasing Lucas around and having a mini dance party in his bedroom.

Carrying him and running around pretending like he is flying.

Exploring the backyard with dude and the puppy.

I wouldn't change this for anything.

<3

Saturday Weigh-in... Sorta.

I have discovered something that most women have a bad habit about. Weighing yourself every day or numerous times of day can be hazardous to your ego. Fluctuations in water weight have a big influence on the scale. For the first couple of weeks, I weighed in on Saturdays.  That was me "official" weight.  But some days in between Saturdays I'd "feel fat" or even "feel skinny" so I would weigh myself. sometimes I was pleasantly surprised. Some days I wanted to kick myself for not working out more the day before.  It took some time to realize that on Saturdays, the number on the scale was always lower than last Saturday.  It has become my favorite day of the week.  It's nice to see that I am doing something right.

Well this week has been crazy with Dan leaving for a month and Lucas is working on three teeth at once. I kind of forgot what day it was and weighed in YESTERDAY.  My bad.  I'm not going to weigh myself again today, since it most likely didn't change.

Last weeks weight was 243.6

This week's weight (done yesterday) is....

 That's a whole 3.4 lbs! For a total loss of 11.3lbs!

I would say that I'm proud of myself.  But honestly, I should never have gotten up to this weight in the first place. I can't celebrate it, because to me, I'm just doing something that needed to be done.  Celebrating this would be like celebrating taking a shower daily. I'll reward my efforts with a few extra years of life and being able to go in public without thinking everyone is staring at the fat girl. 

Anyways, I plan on posting about my weigh ins on Saturdays. So stay tuned!

You have questions, I have answers

Sooo Ive been getting asked the same questions on facebook since I started posting about all this. I figured I'll answer them here and maybe clear some things up.

- What's your secret? No secret, just good 'ol diet and exercise!  I think diet is the wrong word to use here, though.  I'm not following any crazy fad, or taking any pills.  They put nutrition facts on the box for a reason people!  Better yet, eat more things that don't come in boxes.  Fresh vegetables are your friends! They are still delicious without being drenched in cheese or butter. Also, I used to drink Dr. Pepper like it was keeping me alive! Soda has no health benefits whatsoever! I quit cold turkey and haven't had any in over 5 weeks! Water does your body good!

- How do you work out? My dear husband bought me a treadmill when I decided to turn my life around. I started off slow and walked for 30 or more minutes a day.  Now I can jog for an extended period of time. I also started P90X about 2 weeks ago. It's going well so far, but it's only for people who are willing to commit. After this, I plan on doing Insanity, also from the makers of P90X.  We'll see how this goes!
 
-Why are you doing this? I'm doing this because I'm sick of being embarrassed for other people to see pictures of me.  I'm sick of not looking good in anything I wear.  I want to run around with my son and not feel like dying.  I want to give him a sibling sometime soon.  I've been making unhealthy choices for a while, and it's time to change.  I was about 140 lbs when I joined the Navy. Over the 18 months of training, I gained 60lbs. I was 200lbs when I found out I was pregnant. Gained 45lbs over 41 weeks of pregnancy, then dropped down around 210lbs shortly after my son's birth.  My husband was deployed for 6 months and instead of getting healthy then, I ate myself to a whopping 251lbs. It's time to take control of my body!

                                          Me right after bootcamp July 2008, around 140lbs

                         Me and my wonderful Hubby on our wedding day, Jan 17, 2009. around 155lbs.

                                                12 weeks pregnant, March 2010. 200+lbs

                                   The week Dan came back for deployment, July 2011. 250lbs


-How long has it been? I started just about 5 weeks ago. In those 5 weeks, I've lost just over 11lbs and 24 inches from various parts of my body!

Thank you for the support, and maybe I can inspire someone else to change their ways!

The Beginning

***So I've been sitting on this post for a few days.  Guess I finally got the balls to post it. Please, no judgement!

I've been spamming my Facebook with all sorts of motivational quotes and updates on my weightloss journey. I'm sure there are people that wish I wouldn't, but then again they wouldn't really be my friends. But to save annoyance, I figured I could put all that here and the people who give a crap could come read about it.

So if you are reading this, thank you for giving a crap! I guess I'll start with why I'm doing this. There's many reasons, but the biggest is this: IM FAT! Now I know people are gonna say "don't say that, it's not nice". Well, my gut isn't nice; neither is my triple chin. I feel honesty is going to get me where I need to be. I always saw myself as "the fat girl" in high school. Boy was I dumb. Softball was good to me... And my ass. Now I actually AM the fat girl. But no more! I WILL get healthy and at least average in weight. So here it is, my "before" stats. A lot of you don't know these numbers, and I can't believe I'm going to put it out there. It's embarrassing that I let myself get this way, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, right???

Starting weight: 251.5 (eek!)            Goal weight: ~145 (I'll know when I get there)

Starting Neck: 16 inches                  Current Neck: 15 inches

Starting Bust:  49.5 inches                Current Bust:  43.5 inches

Starting Waist:  44.5 inches              Current Waist:  40 inches

Starting Hips:  54.5 inches                Current Hips:  50.5 inches

Starting L Arm:  15.5 inches             Current L Arm:  14 inches

Starting R Arm:  15.5 inches             Current R Arm:  14 inches

Starting L Thigh:  28.5 inches            Current L Thigh:  25.75 inches

Starting R Thigh:  28 inches               Current R Thigh:  25.75 inches

This is my handsome husband, and the only "full bod" before shot that I have. No more!!

And this is my main inspiration for living, my amazing son, Lucas.